NUDA VERITAS

its past midnight. its finals week. the dread of knowing what lies on the other side, yet the knot in the stomach of having to live through the exhausting experience between now and then. i wish it were summer already. the aroma of coppertone with the mixture of sand and the soft breeze of warm air as i dig my toes deeper and deeper into the core of the earth, embezzled in the damp cold.  i detest how the rest of cupertino has thrown their hands up in a celebratory manner, embracing the summer climate and dealt with the hand of melancholy and boredom whilst i must feign diligence in studying for classes i hardly give a shit about. its now one. i have an art history final tomorrow. no biggie. because one, im a huge art junkie. i am passionate about what im learning in the class and it almost comes naturally to identify and recall the pieces straight from memory. its called being a visual learner. thats why equations and numbers dont pervade through my thick skull. two, i have an impressive 98 percent in the class and should have nothing to fear. yet at the routinely procrastination of studying the night before the big test, i take out the syllabus and am served with a list of artists and their works to memorize all by tomorrow. art should be enjoyable, not inflicting pain…

to be completely truthful. i actually ended class rather early today and came home soon after noon. and now i am here still not studying my ass off. instead, i had spent today reading blogs and channel surfing, even pausing to take a wondrous two hour slumber on my couch. gg bertrand. something about other ppl’s blogs fascinate me. maybe its the feeling of gaining knowledge just by reading the posts, the curiosity of voyeurism as i am granted access to their inner most conscience yet without their very knowing. that is, until the creeperness overwhelms me and i am guilted to press the button and start following them on tumblr.

in two days, my official summer vacay starts. in six, it will come to a halt as summer quarter begins. i love life already. i want to hang out. i hate saying no to offers and declining a chance to meet up and have fun. i want to watch toy story 3. badly. real badly. its like a reunion with your childhood. the everlasting nineties and the nostalgic memories. good times. im so behind in everything pop culture and media it drives me insane. i want a summer job above all probably. in front of me, on my sleek (but rather sticky -thanks brid) coffee table lies a myriad of applications, all empty and staring blankly back as i make eye contact with job offers that are trickling into the hands of other desperate seekers, my stalling increasing their chances of attaining such positions.

while consuming in the fashion world of blogs beforehand, i came across this one in particular

http://www.cedricrivrain.com/

just browse through his portfolio. its breathtaking. his drawings are astounding and i envy his talents in sketching such effortless works. if only i had continued my art training and was nearly as half as good as he is… oh the regrets in life. dont ask me about them. i have way too many to rant about. 

i finally watched gladiator recently. it reminded me of robin hood. ironic how one comes out a decade later than the prior, yet i watch it before. anyway, it was an intensely intriguing movie, filled with a complex and original plot and enough gore and action to keep me alert and on the edge of my seat. i love a good underdog movie, a film about the seeking of revenge where and when vengeance should be dealt and is carried out. i have never loved russell crowe more than i did in watching gladiator. therefore, i can only succumb to agreement with the academy in rewarding him the best actor award of that year. the year of the new millennium when i was deemed too young and immature to watch such a violent epic. and ever since, i just have lost interest in seeing it until now, all in its blu-ray HD glory. oh the fascinations and perks of technology and the instant gratification it brings us.

the minute hand doesnt ever take a break. unlike me.  i should get to work. i have over 20 art periods to cover. it wont be easy but its not excruciatingly difficult. ill manage. goodnight world. ill see you around the corner

hello blog. i make my return. i havent posted in quite a while. with me, i usually find a source of interest and become totally compelled by it to dropping all other fads to center my attention on this budding hobby. for me, this was in the form of crocheting and watching a korean drama. call me out and insult me by stating im an ahjumma or some old maid. yes i know, i have fallen victim to the cult of domestication but with what cupertino has to offer, its not that bizarre. i love knits. the cable-ing, the extensive patterns. its just what appeals to me. not much to it. i was in the process of wrapping up my circle scarf and unifying the two ends together when i realized i had ran out of yarn, and not a lot either which drove me to irritation. i was in no place to flaunt money around when my mom had cut my ties with the credit card after reviewing my bank statement for the month prior and buying a complete ball of yarn when all i needed was about 3 feet was surely not thrifty. i even considered heading to michaels, scissors in hands, and cutting off the amount necessary to finish my first piece. safe to say, i was never left to that choice and simply just sanely went and purchased the yarn.

adding to my list of florida senior citizen retirement home status, i have found a new fascination with mahjong. my mum and her friends have their mahjong nights and she always returns home with such allusive stories of the strategy and mentality it takes for one to excel in this archaic game. once those words strategy and competition hits my brain, its as if im brought back to my survivor-mindset and the drive to win. mahjong is fun but i rather play than bring in novices into the game. its challenging enough to concentrate on the game, let alone aiding another player in tile-reading and decision-making.

this summer, unlike last’s, i hope to mend most broken fences as a form of catharsis. i admit, i tended to be on the impulsive side when making decisions and rash to terminating relationships. i guess watching guilty pleasures such as classic real housewives of new york city has taught me that its fine to bicker and banter at each other but in the end, ideally, a patching up should be included in the equation. with that set, i would just like this summer to be more mellow, less dramatic, and a whole lot more engaging and entertaining.